Our little angels

On Thursday, May 21st, we went in for our first ultrasound. The truth is, 14 weeks is a little early for an ultrasound, but since we had not yet been able to detect a heart beat, my doctor wanted to check on everything and be sure my dates were correct. Our first surprise was that as soon as we saw the image, we noticed that there was not one baby, but two! I knew something had been different this time around. I have never been so tired in my life. There were times when I would sleep 12 hours at night and be ready to lay down by 9am. I could hardly eat because I was so sick and I was just beyond exhausted. Since we had not been able to hear a heart beat at the doctor's office, I asked the ultrasound tech. if he had found one. They are so helpful-not really. All he could say was "I'll have your doctor give you a call. I can't really say much." So, we left the ultrasound not sure whether to be excited or devistated. About an hour later, we got a call from my doctor. Indeed, our worst fears were confirmed, as both babies had stopped growing at about 10 weeks. There really is not words to describe that call. Even though the babies had not been born, I felt a terrible loss. I had to have another ultrasound to confirm the miscarriage and was then scheduled for same day surgery. What a whirlwind of emotions a day like that can carry. One moment, I felt alright and knew that I would be fine. The next, I just couldn't control my tears. I wish the ultrasound picture came through better. It looks like two little babies with their legs crossed at the ankles. I guess only a mother can love her unborn children. So, as we cope with the loss of two angels, we wanted you all to know that we will not be welcoming our third child until a little later down the road.